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Seeking Online Connections: More to Explore than Tinder

Posted on October 18 2016

I often get asked where to meet like-minded individuals, or where I’d recommend heading to find out more about a specific kink or interest. My answer is obviously tailored to the person’s desires, which wildly varies. Here are a few resources that may be helpful, or may at least pique your interest.

Feeld (formerly 3nder)


Feeld — A space where you can meet open-minded couples and singles who breathe freedom.

“A field for you to discover your sexuality and explore it by yourself, with your other half or with any human you'd like. I am the fruit of the love of one human to another, and their journey together. They want to feel and be free, together. Why abide by norms you never defined? Explore love beyond society's norms. I am open-minded. I am future.”

Originally named 3nder, which is clearly a play on Tinder, but for threesomes, the company rebranded to be more inclusive to those seeking connections beyond a ménage à trois. It’s similar to Tinder; where you create a profile and can swipe away. Luckily for those who may be shy to expose their sexual interests, you can turn on Incognito mode to hide your profile from your Facebook friends.

The app is very inclusive and allows you browse through only those in the pool who fit what you’re looking for (female, male, male + female couple, male + male couple, female + female couple, trans within the age spectrum that you’ve specified). Group chats can be created in order to make sure everyone is on the same page. The in-app camera feature isn’t the best, but photo expire, similar to Snapchat, but there is no notification should someone screenshot the image.

Opinion & Advice: People cut to the chase and know what they want. Be honest, upfront, and know what you’re getting yourself into.


Social Network

FetLife is a Social Network for the BDSM, Fetish & Kinky Community.

“Like Facebook, but run by kinksters like you and me. We think it is more fun that way. Don't you?”

If you’re looking to explore BDSM, this is the one for you. Not only can you find people with similar fetishes, but you can also learn from others' experiences on the forums while getting involved with the community by attending events.

Opinion & Advice: Be respectful of people’s privacy. Many people in the community are not “out”, so be careful of what you do or say. Dive in and learn from those with experience. Lastly, as with any type of exposure, it can bring unwanted attention, so be conscientious of giving too much information about yourself until you’ve vetted someone.


Social Network

Who is Kasidie? She is us, she is you.

"Kasidie represents hot, fun, open-minded, uninhibited people who enjoy life to the fullest. Making new friends, being social, indulging in your desires, and having fun really are what Kasidie is all about."

If you’re interested in Swinging, this is a great resource. There’s also lots of exposure to “lifestyle” events and vacations.

Opinion & Advice: The profile search is quite robust. You can specify in-depth details such as his/her body type (slender, fit & toned, athletic, average, curvy, a few extra pounds, other), preference (strait, open minded, bi-comfortable, bisexual, gay), play comfort (doesn’t play, no swap, soft swap - girl/girl, soft swap - guy/girl, full swap - situational, full swap), and drinking/smoking (yes, no, socially, doesn’t matter). The website could use an aesthetic overhaul but works adequately from a functional perspective. There isn’t much of a scene in the Western New York area, but if you're willing to travel, Kasidie will work out to your benefit.


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